This was my internal reaction when Boy casually told me of his future plans to move out-of-state -someday- and take my future grandchild with him.


My outward reaction was a bit more muted, but nevertheless sad/disappointed/and starting the grieving process.

It’s bad enough that Boy and Mrs. Boy live 4.5 hours away, but a plane ride away?  It’ll make things so much more complicated and distance-y.


I’m not even a grandma yet.  I don’t even have my grandma name yet (SEE THIS). I haven’t made the motorboat sounds on a fat little belly yet.  How can I contemplate having it all and then…not?

I need you experienced Grandmas to tell me I’m making a big deal out of nothing.  I need you to tell me you adjusted just fine.  I need you to tell me you don’t miss the fat rolls (in my case, the fat rolls to be). I need you to talk me off the grandma ledge.

Granddads, don’t be shy.  If this has happened to you and you tell me it’s gonna be OK, I’ll listen.  Well, I’ll try to listen.  All I hear now is….





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  1. Oh No! it is harder. My 4 year old granddaughter ( the one with an imminent little sister on the way, and I skype frequently, we talk on the phone now that she is bigger and has more to say, and she LOVES getting her “MiMi” boxes in the mail. I throw all the things that I find in there, toys, games, clothes, books, puzzles, photos. craft sets, stuffties, what ever treasures I have been finding for my little grands, the other two who are closer get them in smaller doses and more frequently, but she gets hers saved up and all at once. when schedules permit she skypes me in for the box opening. I was even skyped in for the baby shower!

    So you see, Mrs Tucker, (giggle that makes you sound sooo grown’d up) there is still fun to be had, although it is sadder and harder that you can’t hold and cuddle as often. How far away? Is it farther than Minnesota to Alaska?

    • Mrs. Tucker says

      I made boxes like that for Boy when he was away at college!

      They are thinking a place that snows, maybe Colorado. We’re in Texas. ~sob~

  2. You can always threaten to leave them out of your will

  3. You are not overreacting one bit. My grandbabies were both born in my town. I was even the birth coach for my first grandchild which created a special bond beyond the normal grandma-grandchild bond. I saw them every single day. Then my daughter and her husband decided to move away…a nine hour drive away!!!! My heart literally broke…I am sure it would have been visible on an x-ray. I went through a deep depression and cried until I ran out of tears. And I made the 9 hour (one way) drive every three weeks. That was the limit to how long I could live without them.

    After about a year of this my daughter and her husband broke up and she moved closer to us (now only 6 hours drive away). I continued my every 3 week visits but as they grew up I needed more time with them so my husband and I moved closer to them. We now live a 3 hour drive from them (and 1-/12 hr drive from our other daughter who doesn’t have kids yet). Then my husband (a property investor & builder) bought a repo investment house in the same town that the grandbabies live in. This meant that we got to park our RV in an adult park nearby while he did the remodel on the house. So I get to see the kids every day again. PLUS, every other weekend that the grandbabes don’t go to their dads, they come to our home! I also babysit my grandson two days a week (his sister is in school already).

    We subsequently bought a second investment house which my husband is working on right now, and we just made an offer on a third yesterday, therefore it is going to be several more months of seeing my grandbabes daily. But now that we get them every other weekend, when the remodel work is done, I can live with having them every other weekend plus any other time I feel like making the 3 hour drive to their home.

    Soooo, you are not overreacting, you are a grandma and you are bonding with that grandbaby even before s/he is born…you deserve to be with them often. I would do everything in my power to get the kids to stay close enough that you get to be involved in your grandbabies life.

    Hugs! Hoping they don’t move away.


    • WHOA! Well, I can say I don’t *think* we’ll move closer, and that we hope to see all of them as often as possible, but we really don’t know what the future will bring. What’s the saying: Men make plans and God laughs.

      I can hardly wait to meet FB. I’m sure if I love him half as much as I love Boy, my heart WILL break 🙂

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