10 Things My Mother Taught Me

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My mother, The German, and I rarely saw the world through the same prism.  She was German; I was American.  She was ladylike; I was a tomboy.  She only cursed in German; I cursed in three languages.  She insisted my brothers be coddled; I insisted she’d lost her mind.  She never spoke of politics or religion; I spoke of God and Nixon/Ford/Carter/ et.al. without end.  She thought the truth was dangerous; I thought the truth would set us free.

When I was younger, we clashed in most things.  When I became a mother, I entered the age of appreciation.

While it is still unusual for us to agree, I have learned so much from my mother and thought I’d offer a Mother’s Day Tribute to her wisdom and strength.

10 Things My Mother Taught Me

#1:  The German taught me how to stand in the face of adversity. She’s a woman of considerable strength and stubbornness, after all she remained married to my father until his death and those who knew him understand what that meant. If he had been my Husband, my boot would have been up his ass every. single. day. (and I adored him)

#2:  She taught herself English through knitting manuals. BOOM! Impressive and true. This feat taught me humility, slapping me in the head with the fact that I was not nearly as smart as I liked to think, or reminded her of in my youth, because I can’t even decipher the damned manuals IN ENGLISH.

#3:  The German taught me the art of acting like you don’t care when you really do. She had a hard life, yet acted as if it was nothing.  While on the surface this trait may seem a weakness, in the business world it is valued beyond gold. Never let them see you sweat. It earned me many a sale.

#4:  The German taught me the love of baking. Baking memories are the fondest memories I have from childhood. It was one of the few things we had in common, and one of the few times we could talk and not irritate each other. The memories still make me smile.

#5:  The German taught me about love of country. She never missed an opportunity to tell us how spoiled we were or how lucky we were to have been born American. She backed those comments up with stories from her WWII youth and the horror of it all kept me awake at night thanking God that I had been born free, born an American. It also gave her children the delightful catch phrase we still use today (said in a thick German accent): Never trust a Russian (As a joke, when I first introduced Husband to her, I whispered, “He’s Russian.”).

#6:  The German taught me that even though you may not like someone, you can love them. This has been a great lesson in remembering God’s will first in all I do.

#7:  The German taught me that that there is redemption in grandchildren.

#8:  The German taught me that while loving someone, yet no so much liking them, you can offer support that will make a significant difference. She was the first person on board when we made the decision to home school Boy. This was back when the law in Texas was ambiguous and the threat of being arrested was so real that I carried the name and number of our lawyer everywhere I went.  She never wavered. Not once. Not only didn’t she waver, but she encouraged us every. single. year. That support turned out to mean more to me than almost anything else she ever offered.

#9:  The German taught me that if I wanted something, that I should seize the moment. After all, she met my father in Germany as a young woman, married him a month later, moved to the states not knowing the language and had 5 children is short order. She has always said that she had no regrets.

And finally…

#10) The German taught me the power of saying YES! to someone cooking for you.  The last time I was home, she tried in vain to cook for me. She wanted to make pork chops and her famous potato salad (yum), but I was too interested in the fast-food flavors of my youth. Looking back, I see what a schmuck I was. One day she won’t be able to cook and I will kick myself for not eating it when I could.

When I was younger, I didn’t think my mother was smart or strong or much of anything except a mother to rambunctious kids. Funny how life has a way of proving you wrong.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!

 10 Things My Mother Taught Me

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  1. Such a wonderful post – it is amazing, isn’t it, that it takes nearly a lifetime to process and appreciate all of the things we learned, and for far too long, took for granted from our Mother’s. Love that you can curse in three languages, so jealous! I really appreciate that you shared this with us. Have a wonderful and fantastic Mother’s Day!

    • Mrs. Tucker says

      Thank you so much. I grew up across the street from a woman from Mexico, my mother was German and of course English. I would have homemade tortillas one day, German food the next and then a Twinkies for a snack. I listened as well as watched and picked up the more colorful words!

      Happy Mother’s Day!

  2. I grew up in a German family and I see many traits that your Mother has in myself. My own children could have written that about me and my daughter never wants me to cook for her either:) Have A Happy Mother’s Day~ Lynn @ Turnips 2 Tangerines

    • Mrs. Tucker says

      Well, I have officially changed my stance on the cooking offer! How could I refuse?! ~such an idiot~

      Thanks for coming by. Happy Mother’s Day!

  3. I couldn’t have said it any better! xoxoxo. Happy Mother’s Day!!

  4. AH what a PHENOMENAL post! 🙂

  5. This is a lovely tribute to your beautiful mother. She did well.
    I admire the courage of women who pack their bags and move to not just another state, but to a different country, never looking back. I’m impressed at the determination of women who simply decide they are going to learn the new language and then set out to find their own way to do it! I smile at the prejudices of women like your mom and my maternal grandmother, a Lithuanian immigrant who tenaciously clung to a centuries old border dispute by admonishing her three granddaughters to “never bring home a Polish man.” My sister dated the nicest guy, conveniently leaving the “ski” off his last name when he was introduced to grandma. That left him with a really, reallllly odd last name, but fortunately she was so delighted with that handsome, well-mannered gentleman that she never paid attention to it!

    • Mrs. Tucker says

      This gave me a smile. As a young girl, a proud American and Texan, I struggled to understand my mother in so many ways, but as a grown woman I’ve come to understand that most of us are the same when it comes to the love for our family. I love the “never bring home a polish man.” LOL!

  6. I love this! Your Mom sounds absolutely wonderful (surely you don’t call her “the German?” HAHA) I can tell you have her confidence and determination as well! And how lucky she is to be a great-grandmother now. Thanks for sharing this special person with us……we’ve been so focused on Sweet E!
    I wish you both a wonderful day tomorrow, Patti!
    Joan gramcrackercrumbs

    • Mrs. Tucker says

      I DO call her The German…sometimes. She thinks it’s funny. I told her that when I write about her that’s her moniker. We’re an odd family!

      Happy Mother’s Day!

  7. Carol Covin says

    What a lovely tribute. There are lots of things about my mother that annoyed me until she came to live with us and I mellowed a bit, considering she was suddenly, unlike any time in her life and through no fault of her own (a stroke) completely dependent on me. When I write posts about her now, 10 years after her death, I am reminded how many things she taught me.

    • Mrs. Tucker says

      Full circle, baby! That’s what happens to use when we have a bit of life under our belts. The gift is when we go looking for the good stuff, isn’t it?

  8. What a wonderful post to honor your mother! It’s funny how we thought mom was just mom until we grow up and have kids of our own. new fan from Sunday Social! If you have some time, stop by and mingle with us @ The SHOW OFF Blog Party :). Happy Mother’s Day!


  9. Julie Jordan Scott says

    Hi there! I am here from Pin It Monday & you are the very first blogger from there I have visited and I was so delighted to read this Mommying Wisdom. I repinned you – and wish you only the best!

    I hope my children remember me with lots of love. My 15 y/o dd even wrote about how marvelous I am on twitter which is pretty darned nice…..

    • Mrs. Tucker says

      Whoa…a tweet about your awesomeness from a teen?! That is a Happy Mother’s Day. Thanks for the great comment.

  10. Hi, I found your blog via the Grand Social. Your portrait of your mother reminds me so much of my own except she was Irish. Thank you for sharing.

  11. Nici ~ Posed Perfection says

    Great post! I can appreciate all the wonderful truths of your mother. My mother is also from Germany, met my father there and moved to the States not knowing anyone and barely any English. She jokes that she learned the language watching Archie Bunker 😉 It is so true that we don’t appreciate or recognize the wonderful qualities of our parents until we are parents ourselves, or even later. Thanks so much for stopping by today and leaving a sweet comment about my Rocky Road Pudding Cookies. I appreciate your visit! Hope you’ll visit again soon.

  12. Claire @ A LIttle Claireification says

    I love this post!! Thanks so much for linking this up at my “Best of The Weekend” party. Featuring this tomorrow on my blog. Hope to see you this Saturday for the next party!
    🙂 Claire

  13. Thanks for sharing this! Thanks for linking up with Domestic Superhero today!

  14. Aw 🙂 What a lovely post for Mother’s Day! As one of the co-hosts from the My Favorite Posts Weekend SHOW OFF Party! I wanted to personally thank you for linking up with us & to invite you to add me to your G+ circles or follow me on Twitter or Facebook as I’ve done the same with you. Also, I run a link party on my food blog, anyonita-nibbles.com where you can link up recipes or food related posts.


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